I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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