im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
