I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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