Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
