def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
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he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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