There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize