How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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