oh god the rape fog is back!
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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