Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
No subtext here. People are naked.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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