someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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