Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block