That's intense
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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