I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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