dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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