So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Randomize
