I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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