On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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