I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize