like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
