So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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