Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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