I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
