if you like me you must not know who I am
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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