Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
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