My nipple is on Facebook.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
