If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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