I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
