My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
