Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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