I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Randomize