Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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