The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
