I think I am morally bankrupt
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
