It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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