am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
