you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
