mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
