Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
