remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
