Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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