Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
