I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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