question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
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