The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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