Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
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I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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