i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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