so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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