"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
