But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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