Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
wow bdsm is so cute
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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