if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
