so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize